


What If..

by theheartchoice



Series: DeanCas Codas | Season 15 [3]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angel Castiel (Supernatural), Canon Compliant, Coda, Dead Castiel (Supernatural), Dean Winchester Talks About Feelings, Doubtful Dean Winchester, Endgame Castiel/Dean Winchester, Episode: s15e20 Carry On, Fix-It of Sorts, Good Sibling Sam Winchester, Hopeful Ending, M/M, Pining Dean Winchester, Post-Episode: s15e19 Inherit the Earth, Season/Series 15, Speculation, Temporary Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-18
Updated: 2020-11-18
Packaged: 2021-03-09 19:15:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,379
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27601273
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theheartchoice/pseuds/theheartchoice
Summary: As Sam and Dean prepare to rescue Cas from The Empty, Dean worries over the reality of Cas' words in 15x18: Can Angels really fall in love?Just a little coda set after 15x19.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Series: DeanCas Codas | Season 15 [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1676371
Comments: 2
Kudos: 111





	What If..

**Author's Note:**

> I really hope something like this happens in the finale. Cas deserves to be saved (in more ways than one).

"We're all set here."

Dean hums as Sam brushes his hands together in his periphery. He didn't even realise they were so close to finishing the set up. 

"Now it's just a matter of timing." 

_Timing_. Cas had the worst timing. Saying something like that at a time like that, leaving Dean with more questions than answers. 

"Dean?" 

"..Huh?" 

"You okay? You spaced-out, for a minute there." 

"Yeah, I'm just—" he waves a hand around, trying and failing to capture what he's feeling. 

"Look, about Jack," Sam steps closer, voice dipping to a tone that means sympathy and support, the kind that gets a work out on a case. "I know things with you two have always been kind of complicated, and I can imagine that him not bringing Cas back has only made things harder—" 

"—Woah, Sam. No. I get it— _really_. He's _hands off_ , y'know? Probably for the best. Meddling was Chuck's problem, it's how everything got so screwed up in the first place." Not that he's palming all his mistakes off on bad writing, but still. Jack not intervening is a good thing, in a way. 

"Yeah, I guess. Makes you wonder if he might not condone what we're doing here, you know?" 

Dean hums again. "But you'd think if he let anyone have one more get-out-of-jail-free card it'd be Cas. Who knows, maybe Jack's rootin' for us."

"Yeah, maybe," Sam chuckles. "Don't worry. It's gonna work."

That's sort of what Dean's worried about. 

"You seem nervous."

Maybe Sam could help. 

"You sure you're okay?" 

"I just—" how does he even phrase it? "When Cas was—I mean, before he _saved_ me, he.. said some stuff." 

"What kind of stuff?" 

"Big stuff. Deathbed confession, type-stuff." 

"Confession? What did he—" and realisation dawns on Sam, because of-fucking-course it does. " _Oh_."

No use hiding it now. "Yeah, 'oh'."

"So. He finally told you." 

Wait _what_? "What d'you mean _finally_?" 

"Dean." And there's so much in just that one word. "Cas has been in love with you for.. well, I don't know how long, exactly. A while, I think. Years." 

Dean's lungs empty in a rush. "Okay, see, that's the thing: he's an _Angel_ , Sam."

"Yeah, I kinda picked up on that."

Dean sends him a bitch face but Sam just smiles. "Tha—it's a _human_ emotion. Angels don'—they _can't_ feel that way." _Right?_

"Serafina did."

"Pretty sure she and Adam from the freakin' Garden of Eden knew each other for more than a few years. More like _eons_." 

"Since when does time determine love?" Sam gets a look Dean remembers from when he'd talk about the past, about Jess. Probably not something he wants to bring up right now, seeing as how Eileen's right outside. 

"Cas is my best friend, but he's literally older than the world." 

"So it's an age-thing?" 

"Wh—? No!" Dean takes a deep breath, to steady himself, steady his train of thought. "I know Cas is an Angel, okay? I mean, there's the mojo, and the not-sleeping, and he saw the first fish crawl outta the ocean—the whole nine. That's not what's botherin' me." Sam waits patiently. "I know he cares. I just don't know if.." _If he feels the same way I do_. "If he really feels the way he thinks he does. About me, about love, an'.." Dean swallows. " _Love_."

For all his tact in handling witnesses during a case (people who're at their most vulnerable), Sam fucking _snickers_. 

Dean glares daggers; half-hurt, half not surprised because isn't that how little brothers are supposed to act? They laugh at their sibling's relationship troubles? But Sam gets it, because his face softens. 

"Dean. Maybe Angels do feel things differently from Humans. In fact, it's pretty much guaranteed. But Cas has always been different from the rest of them. And I've been here over the years, you know. I've _seen_ it." 

"Seen what?" 

"The way he looks at you. And I never thought it was some big secret, I mean— _you_ saw it too! And you looked at him the same way." 

"Did not!" Sam gives him that: _c'mon Dean you can't fool me here_ face, and he let's it go. Sam's probably not wrong. 

"What did you say? After he told you."

"I.." _Nothing_. He told Cas— _begged_ him not to do it that way—but everything was happening so fast, and there was a decade's worth of doubt stopping Cas' words—those three huge words—from sinking in. Even after, as everything finally hit him and he curled up on the dungeon floor and cried his freakin' eyes out, even then, even _now_ , he still doesn't know what he would've said if he had the moment again. "There was no time."

Sam nods. "Well, now there is. You guys can talk—"

"—What if I'm right?" Sam's brow crinkles at that. "I mean, no offence Sam, but I know him better than you do. What if.. what Cas feels, is.." he trails off, unable to get the words out. 

"..Are you worried he's _not_ in love with you, or that he is?" 

One sounds better than the other. Both sound kinda terrifying. 

Sam sighs, and it's almost pitiful.

"I don't wanna lose him." As a friend, most of all. Because if Cas misunderstood the whole love-confession thing being for non-brotherly love then Dean won't say anything, obviously, but it'll hurt. Cas will be back but things will be different—worse actually, because that whole thing with The Empty made him confront his own feelings (or stop suppressing them, at least). Cas isn't just a friend to him, and it's not familial either. But can they go back to being 'just friends' after everything? Can Dean? 

"Dean, no matter what happens you're not going to lose him. Just look at everything the two of you have already been through."

Now there's a distracting and somewhat depressing train of thought. Apocalyptic times can't tear them apart, not for good, and even death is nothing new. It would be a painful joke of cosmic proportions if the thing that actually ruins their friendship is love. 

"Do you love him?" Dean's head snaps up to meet Sam's eyes. "Are _you_ in love with Cas?" 

Eileen returns before he can think of a way to deflect, cutting off anymore talk about it. 

She gestures to Sam and he tells Dean, "It's time. You ready?" 

Dean's not sure what he would've said but the truth is best kept for Cas' ears anyway. And Sam's right. They have time. They can talk, and hopefully they'll figure things out and where they stand with as little heartache as possible. There's no avoiding it, not now, not after everything. He nods, steeling his resolve. "Yeah. I'm ready." 

At least he knows Chuck is no longer pulling their strings and that whatever happens from here on out it really is just him and Cas. The thought never even crossed his mind that Cas' confession might be Chuck's doing. Chuck didn't care enough about him to bother, and besides: Cas was always the rebel against God's story.

Dean steps over the threshold of painted sigils, taking his place in the centre of the circle. As Sam starts chanting he feels his worry over the truth of Cas' words ebb away and hope flow in to supplant it. The phantom scar of a handprint on his shoulder from when Cas rescued from Hell seems to flare to life and brand itself back into Dean's flesh, and the only thing going through his mind is: _what if Cas really is in love with me?_ He smiles at the thought. 

As the glowing portal tears into existence before him he remembers something else Cas said to him, back when Dean was questioning his whole reality. Cas was steadfast and sincere as ever as he held Dean's eye and told him that _they_ were real. And for the first time Dean _knows_ that to be true. He feels it in his very soul. 

With his hand raised he moves towards the portal and braces for some kind of inter-dimensional shift, but he's not scared. This is the right thing to do, for both of them. 

Time to grip an Angel tight and raise him from perdition. 

**Author's Note:**

> ♡ [like + reblog on tumblr](https://theheartchoice.tumblr.com/post/635112689964843008/destiel-coda-15x19) ♡
> 
> This was inspired by [Jensen explaining Dean's reaction to Cas' love confession](https://hashtagteamfreewill.tumblr.com/post/634908419511484416/) in 15x18, how Dean wasn't sure Cas meant what he said because he's an Angel and surely Angels can't fall in love. Also the headcanon that Jack didn't resurrect Cas because he wanted to give Dean the chance to do it. I also wanna see human!cas endgame, so that would definitely come from this, ie. Cas leaving his Grace behind in The Empty or some such. 


End file.
